Disclaimer: This is exactly what the title says just in Lando aka WAY too many words. This is my view of Friday, Saturday, and Sunday (Sort of) as Coach Stacey, Coach Lauren, and Jaime of Charlestown competed as the #landoladies team at the Wodapalooza Fitness Festival in Miami, Florida. My role was “Coach” of this juggernaut team. My coaching started a few months ago once they qualified as one of 60 teams to do so from the original pool of over 1000. Once the event started, however, my coaching became less coaching technique and strategy and more support holding towels, water bottles, and ensuring appropriate numbers of snacks and PB&J was available at all times.
This is the weekend of the Lando Ladies @ Wodapalooza!
Well let me tell you something. This weekend was nothing like anything I have seen in my years coaching ANY sport, CrossFit especially. It was beautiful to watch, painful to watch, glorious to experience, anxiety inducing to the point of crippling anxiety, and gave me emotions and feels I haven’t had as a coach in many years. This event was something to behold, and that became more because of the performance our community representatives were putting on than it was the event and Miami as a whole.
I wish you all could have seen it go down, especially for those of you who donated your own money to help make the trip possible. Thank you from Stacey, Lauren, Jaime, and myself. Thank you.
THE BEGINNING The weekend event started with a 5am wake up call, uber ride to Biscayne Bay, and a 5k run with 200 meter water run/walk/swims every quarter of the way. I had the tough task of being towel boy and watching the sun rise with Jupiter and Venus next to it on the skyline. I guess that’s a rare sighting that area and time of morning. Can someone say foreshadowing??? Eh, doesnt work there I don’t think but you get the point. Maybe. I think it’s cool. Moving on.
It was the first of many times that these three girls would face a workout that made them afraid due to total unknown. That’s what made their performance so amazing so many times. It’s not like many of these were just hard workouts that they would otherwise know from daily training. Swimming, beach runs, odd objects were the name of the game, and the game started with day 1 event 1. From experience let me tell you that competing as a team member in CrossFit is both much easier and much harder than as an individual. Easier because the focus isn’t all on you and people can bail you out. Harder because the focus can also all be on you when you completely drop the ball for your teammates. Really, either way you are f**ked.
None of these 3 girls liked running, let alone on the beach, let alone after 5 hours of sleep, let alone mixed with water sports, yet there I was at the finish line with my gaggle of towels beaming like a proud papa as each of them crossed the finish line. Sick thing about competitions like this is they had about 2 minutes to towel off before we had to get into an uber to get bak to the hotel, recover and refuel so they could get out to event #2 in a few hours.
Ill spare you a detailed step by step of each event. The rest of Friday had each girl doing multiple things that made me stand there cheering wildly and wishing again our Lando community could be there to see. Stacey completely dominated a workout that had her do 15 thrusters, carry a 100# sandbag 100′, do 5 rope climbs, then repeat the sandbag and thrusters….and she did it all in 2:00. Think through that again, then think about that time. Yeah.
Jaime literally broke herself to do her thrusters at the end UB of the same workout when she absolutely had to and absolutely couldn’t…yet did. Then Lauren learned on the fly how to carry the sandbag that weighed literally almost as much as her and she did it with dominance aka showed the sandbag who’s bit*h it was.
Given that we were all bunking up together in our
slum 33rd floor waterfront with balcony condo, I got a lot of QT with these ladies. I heard them talk about their fears and dread on the horizon which universally was event 2 of day 2. This here is where I will summarize the rest of the weekend and finish up this story.
This also gives insight into how just ridiculously unnecessarily hard they make these events. This last event for the day consisted of something called a Ski Erg which is like the Row Ergs we have just simulating power pulls when skiing in the snow. After about 2 minutes of this (which literally is about as hard as sprinting 1-2 minutes straight on the Assault Bike) they literally walked to a platform and DOVE IN THE MOTHERF***NG OCEAN, proceeding to swim 250 meters in the open GOD DAMN OCEAN. After this they then finished with about 3 more minutes on the ski erg.
Let me repeat. Perform movement that was as hard as sprinting on the Assault Bike for 1-2 minutes straight. Immediately get the energy and courage to walk to literally a plank that is over the ocean and JUMP IN. Swim 250-300m in said ocean. Then repeat the awful sprint movement. Oh and if you get scared and need help in the water? You are disqualified meaning you get your team disqualified. So it’s either finish, get your team disqualified, or drown. This workout was done “waterfall style” with one person starting on the Erg. After they finished skiing and
went to walk the plank to their death dove into the ocean to start the swim, the next teammate could go, with the 3rd following. The order was my beloved Stacey, then Jaime, with Lauren.
I tell no lie in saying that once I watched Stacey, my partner in all phases of my life professional and personal, who I love dearly and couldn’t lose and function again in life, literally march down and jump into the water beyond where I could any longer see, it was so stress inducing I literally could no longer watch. My anxiety overtook me and I almost projectile vomited all over the nice relatives of the team from Columbia that was standing next to me. Take a walk I did. I made it back just in time to see Stacey in the bright blue sports bra top they chose as their team color that event and felt a wave of relief that wasn’t done before anxiety overtook and gained hold. I could only bare to watch the water where the athletes exited the rest of the time, begging with each second that the next person out would be Jaime, then Lauren.
What seemed like an eternity passed then it happened. Jaime. Then Lauren, and I almost ran onto the floor to hug them while screaming at them for making me so stressed out and how dare they put themselves in so much danger and don’t they know how worried I get when they’re out past curfew…
Yet again what is lost is how downright scared all three of them were before this event. Stacey is about as good as it gets, especially when being a teammate, at staying stoic before workouts. Even she was breaking just a bit (never all the way, never). See they had weeks to worry about this because it was announced ahead of time. Weeks to think about the unknown while knowing the only thing that mattered to them which was they were facing an open water swim.
And athey not only finished, they dominated it. Multiple teams got disqualified because they couldn’t even hack the swim, got pulled out of the water like a bunch of drunk wet rats. Not these #landoladies. So proud.
I think you all get the point. Stacey, Lauren, and Jaime went down to Wodapalooza and conquered many things at once. Fears of open water swimmings, working out on the big stages, wearing short shorts while training in front of more than 0 people, double unders in competition, doing movements they never have done before but now on a streamed to thousands massive internationally watched stage had to try, and not drowning while getting fit, all were conquered.
Most impressive of all, they went down to Miami because on a whim these 3 girls formed a team to qualify for the hardest event to qualify for outside of the actual CrossFit Games.
And they did it.
But then they realized that got their ticket and that was just the start. They then trained for 8 weeks, through Thanksgiving and Christmas partying and gluttony, at 6am on Saturdays and double sessions during the week, to go down there to essentially compete for nothing material. They knew they weren’t leaving with much more than some sweet swag and a lot of debt (much of which was helped thanks to so many of you) but they went and did it anyways.
I know these are my words and not theirs but I feel it represents what they went through at least from the closest person perspective other than their own there could be. They learned more about themselves than they could in 3 months time in just 3 days, and they got some sweet outfits to keep
If you haven’t gotten it up to this point I am incredibly proud of Stacey, Lauren, and Jaime for how they represented themselves and our community down in Miami. Thank you also to Liz, Mel, Pat, and Molly who traveled down to enjoy some Miami vacation and support this team and our community in person. Thank you to all of you who donated (donations still available and welcome) to help make the trip possible.
For real, thank you to all of you so, so much for the donations. You dont know how much that helped since bringing 3-4 people down to Miami for 3-4 nights aint cheap.
And lastly, from myself only and most of all, thank you Stacey, Lauren, and Jaime for letting me be part of such an incredible experience as your
coach #1 fan/cheerleader/supporter. I had a blast (when I was upright) and am so lucky I shared this experience with you all, especially getting to watch you how I did. Thank you for working so hard, thank you for representing this so well, and thank you for doing everything you did to make it all happen. You are the best.
Strength: Hang Power Clean
WOD: 8m AMRAP
5 Hang Power Snatch 75/55
5 Snatch Balance
5 Handstand Push-ups
40 Double Unders
S: 80 Singles, Scaled Push-ups
L1: 80 Singles or Mixed SU/DU, Scaled HSPU
Rx+ : 95/65
EMOM 10m: 1 Heavy Rep
Accessory: Front Squat
EMOM 10m: 1 Rep with 5s Pause In Bottom
Conditioning: 12m AMRAP
Row 750m buy in, then AMRAP with rest of time
5 Hang Power Snatch 75/55
5 Snatch Balance
5 Clapping Push-ups
40 Double Unders
The Program: Rest Day